Poverty is Big Business

The Glorification of Poverty

“But woe to you who are rich, for you have already received your comfort.” These are the words Jesus said in Luke 6:24. This verse and many others are often quoted by proponents of poverty. The rich are portrayed in bad light and wealth is said to be a short cut to hell. On the flip-side, poverty is painted in glorious light. It is said that God loves the poor but is unhappy with the rich. All this is notwithstanding the fact that everyone is working extremely hard to be rich.

Hidden Poverty (The Rat Race)

It has been said that Kenya, and many other countries in a similar economic situation, has a growing middle class. This is the section of the population which has good jobs and is generally comfortable in life. These people are living in nice houses and driving good cars. They eat well and their children consistently attend school.

The middle class cannot be said to be poor in the true sense of the word because they have all that they need. However, everything they have belongs to somebody else and they are in the process of paying for it; something they will do for the rest of their lives. They are servicing car loans, mortgages, and various other forms of credit and if they lose their jobs, they will be permanently ruined. Their lenders (banks and other financial institutions) own them and are making a killing out of them.

Hot Beds of Votes

Slums are the areas with the highest population densities of any society. They also have the highest density of poor people compared with any other residential area (whether rural or urban). Poor people are usually relatively uninformed and therefore easily impressionable. Politicians know this and use slums and other low income areas as brooders for votes. A politician can easily go to such a place and convince people to vote for him with the promise that he will take them out of their poverty once he gets into power.

Religion

Karl Marx once wrote that Religion is the Opium of the People. He implied that the majority of the people, most of whom are poor, use religion as a “fix” in much the same way as an opium user takes the drug to get a high. It is this philosophy that has led to religious leaders taking advantage of poor people. Cults and radical sects are based on this reasoning.

Scholars

Development studies have become quite popular in the modern world. Universities around the world have developed curricular to teach people on how to alleviate poverty in the most disadvantaged communities, particularly in Africa.

 I was once ‘privileged’ to tour Kibera slums during a survey of ‘flying toilets’ by an organisation I worked with. It was while there that I noticed many foreigners walking around conducting studies on various aspects of life in the slums. I was curious as to who they were and whether they were a regular feature there. Our guide informed us that most of them were Masters and PhD students conducting their theses. Millions of dollars in scholarship money is given to such students and I hear there are dozens of books and reports written about our biggest slums.

Development Organisations

It was recently discovered that British Aid money, which had been donated to tackle poverty in third world countries, had actually been used to put up high-end real estate. This was in the form of gated communities and premier shopping malls. It was reported that our very own Garden City in Nairobi benefited from $25 Million of such money. Those involved were unapologetic on being questioned and they said putting up such businesses was more sustainable and impacted more poor people than the traditional forms of Aid disbursement. Some people are striking it rich trading with poverty as a commodity.

Sitting on Treasure

Africa is said to contain much of the world’s resources in the form of minerals. It is however a glaring fact that none of the Countries whose bellies produce such minerals are either stable or prosperous. The prospectors of such wealth (from developed countries) appear to want to work in an environment of conflict. The poverty of the people seems to make for a good environment in which to exploit such resources to the maximum. As people kill each other (with weapons provided by the prospectors), over a few head of cattle or a few acres of scrub-land, billions of dollars in minerals are being siphoned out.

Breakdown of Structures

If poverty is to be conclusively dealt with, it has to involve developing the necessary structures that enable people to move out of it. Such vices as corruption and tribalism give a firm foundation to unscrupulous peddlers of poverty. A lack of good education makes poor people unaware of the possibility of a better life. A few million dollars here and there make those responsible for the eradication of poverty to ignore the plight of millions of people for their own personal gain. Only God can help the poor.

The Socialite Craze

A socialite is a person who is well known in fashionable society and is fond of social activities and entertainment. That is the definition according to the dictionary. Wikipedia asserts that a socialite is a usually a person from a privileged, wealthy, or aristocratic background with a high position in upper class society. It is therefore obvious that in the original meaning of the word, one had to have a particular background in order to become a socialite.

The Kenyan Socialite

For many of us, the word socialite was largely unknown until the advent of social media. The first person I heard being referred to as a socialite was Vera Sidika. I heard she became famous after she was allegedly paid a lot of money to sway her bum in a music video. I later heard of one Huddah Munroe who later got to be in Big Brother’s house. Since these two hit the computer screens, several others have come up.

The Kenyan socialite is markedly different from the people who had been socialites during medieval times. As far as I can tell, none of them are royalty. Neither are they from particularly privileged backgrounds. Apparently, most of them come from relatively modest backgrounds. It may be possible that they don’t realise what they have until somebody points ‘it’ out to them.

Obsession with Anatomy

I don’t know what exactly one has to do to become a socialite in Kenya. What I know with certainty however, is that she (all those we hear of are women) has to be well endowed in certain parts of her anatomy. She also has to have the minimum of a certain shade of skin colour. If these do not occur naturally, then they can be ‘installed’ or enhanced surgically.

Shallowness of Character

I was brought up to appreciate people of good character. In all societies, character is celebrated. People with desirable characters are recognized and often rewarded. They almost always become famous and they are recognized wherever they go. Beyond character, society also appreciates high achievers who go against great odds to excel in different areas.

I can’t say with certainty that Kenyan socialites are of shallow characters. What I know however, is that they are not famous because of their character or any other tangible trait. People do not want to be associated with them because they hope to learn something from them. I don’t think anybody even knows why they are drawn to socialites but whatever it is, it has a very strong pull.

Popularity

One thing is for sure, socialites are popular. Everything they do becomes news. When one of them buys a bed, its picture trends on the internet for weeks. We know about every aspect of their lives including when and how they take a shower and we even have the pictures to prove it. Socialites are more popular than those people who actually do something for us. They are recognized as they walk in town and those who meet them pride themselves in the fact that they know their favourite drink.

Uncertainty of Criteria to Become a Socialite

In historic times, socialites had rather elaborate duties and responsibilities. They were quite knowledgeable and could engage any noble person in an intellectual discussion. They were widely read and wealthy enough to take care of all their needs, including buying their own drinks. They were often invited to parties and special gatherings because they would be indispensable in making the most fussy and grumpy royals feel welcome and entertained.

I know Kenyan socialites get invited to many gatherings especially those involving showbiz personalities. What I can’t tell is what value they add to such gatherings; that is apart from flaunting their gigantic endowments and twitching their heads to flick their expensive hair extensions back into place. I am sure they have some purpose otherwise they would not be invited in the first place. I however don’t know what that purpose is. That is the reason I don’t intend to invite a socialite to any of my parties; not that I expect them to turn up anyway. I also can’t afford to pay them because I hear they don’t come cheap.

P.S. In the spirit of equality, I think we should also have Kenyan male socialites. Maybe then, we would be able to redeem the almost lost socialite image of old.

Fortune Telling Repackaged for the Modern World

It is common for people to try and get an idea of what the future will be like. Many just ignore this urge but some use various methods to predict what destiny has in store for them in the coming hours, days, months, or even years. Those who claim to be able to predict the future have a ready market for their services.

Astrology

I was introduced to astrology by my mum. Now, don’t start getting excited, she was not an astrologer. Neither was she a witch or fortune teller. She was an ordinary lady, a teacher, no less. She, like many other people then, and now, would religiously read the horoscope section of the newspapers and magazines. She used to relate our (my siblings and I) temperaments to our respective zodiac signs.

For those who may not be familiar with what I am talking about, the zodiac is a series of 12 constellations (groups of stars) that hover above the equator. The story is that someone’s star is that represented by the constellation that is visible when they are born. My star is Libra and it symbolized by a weighing scale. My big brother’s star is Leo whose symbol is a lion.

Two of my sisters, one elder and one younger, share a star, Taurus, whose symbol my mum used to say is the head of a buffalo, but am not so sure anymore. I think it’s a cow. The two sisters have a rather sensitive temperament which our mother associated with the buffalo’s. You can therefore see am an “expert Layman” in matters astrology.

Witchcraft

Witchcraft is alive and kicking in this country. Signs have been put up on electricity poles in almost all estates and villages across the country. People in my village had been rather conservative until a witch doctor set up shop there. Everybody was up in arms and they stormed there one morning with the intention of evicting him. He disarmed them by threatening to name those among them who had been seeking his services. That was enough to disperse the group and leave the “good” doctor to his devices since they didn’t want names to be named.

My first encounter with a witch doctor happened at the time when I was a taxi driver. I had to take a client to a small village in Matuu, many kilometres from Nairobi, to visit a witch doctor. The wife of my client was crippled and a friend had told them of a witch doctor who could tell them what had caused the problem, and also recommend a solution. I had shared the full story before here; http://acabdriverstory.blogspot.co.ke/2013/04/a-visit-to-witch-doctor.html.

Chain Letters

The first time I received a chain letter, I was really scared because I believed everything it said. It was purportedly initiated by someone known as St. Jude and it promised great misfortune if I didn’t sent it to at least 20 people. That time I was still in school and I assume whoever sent the letter got my address from the newspaper’s pen pal section where I had posted it. I never got to send the letters as instructed since I could not afford the stamps and neither could I get enough anonymous addresses to send it to. Anyhow, no misfortune befell me that I could directly attribute to my “disobedience”.

Nowadays I receive a lot of chain letters but they don’t scare me anymore. Instead, they irritate me. I consider them to have been initiated by very idle people who want to increase internet traffic to their pages and profiles. I therefore simply ignore demands by anyone telling me to forward some prayer or other message and get blessed within two hours. I think that is all hogwash but then that is just my opinion.

Excuse for Laziness

This entire search for answers about the future to me is just an excuse for people who do not want to do what is required of them. Students want to pass exams without studying by hoping they can know upfront what will be in the exam. Women want to get husbands without getting out there and socialising like normal human beings and going through the selection, courtship, engagement, and marriage process.

It was once claimed that football teams in Africa spend more money on their witch doctors than on the coaches. They believe more in fortune telling than in practice and preparation. I wonder why they don’t defeat teams from the West.

The Big Hoax

When I started writing articles, someone introduced me to a weird niche which pays quite well. It was to do with writing horoscope messages and answering readers’ letters on matters concerning their future. I used to think only expert fortune tellers could know about the future. I was told I could write anything as long as it’s positive and gives the reader hope. I declined due to conflicts with my conscience. I could not imagine some poor soul waiting to hear from me before they could plan their day not knowing it was all a big hoax.

Getting in Touch with My Feminine Side

I would first like to dispel some notions that might ignite rumours. I am not gay and this article is not about gay rights. I am not a transsexual and neither am I a feminist. I’m not one of those ‘Bruce Jenner’ types who feel like a woman trapped in the body of a man. I am an ordinary man who would like to live life to the fullest. It is purely for this reason that I have set out to discover my feminine side.

Dispelling Popular Stereotypes

The male figure has been cast in this ‘macho’ image. The typical male is considered to be above feelings and hurt. He can withstand anything without losing his step. He is also said to be fully confident in himself and does not need anybody’s approval to feel confident in himself. This image was exemplified by our fathers when we were in boarding school. Most of us wanted to be visited by our mothers because they would go to the trouble of preparing and carrying our favourite dishes to school. Most fathers on the other hand would come carrying just a newspaper which he would half-heartedly leave with you when he left.

In his best-selling book, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”, John Gray asserts that men and women are from different planets. If I was to believe him, I would give up my quest to get in touch with my feminine side because it would involve nothing less than expensive space travel. I have however discovered that my feminine side is closer that I had thought before. It is all in the mind – quite literally as I will now explain.

Hormonal Imbalance

Contrary to popular belief, men are more dependent on hormones than women. Androgen, the most mentioned of which is testosterone, controls everything in men from physical development to sexual desire. Estrogen in women serves a less obvious purpose as far as desire is concerned. Women can therefore function fully sexually with minimal use of hormones. Women use more of the ‘feely-feely’ side of their brain to control their desires and emotions.

Two Sides of the Brain

Research has shown that there are subtle differences in how the brains of men and women are developed and wired. Men have a better developed left side of the brain where logic is controlled. Women on the other hand, have a well developed right hand side which controls emotions. In addition to this, women have a better connection between the two sides of the brain.  It is therefore safe to conclude that men and women are not from different planets but rather from different hemispheres of the same planet.

Working with Half a Brain

When Obama was in Kenya, he related failure to uplift women, to being the same as having a team in which half the players are not allowed to play. I have realised that in the same way, if I don’t develop the right-hand side of my brain, I will be operating with half a brain. I will be what my British boss likes to call a nitwit. I have therefore decided to do a few things in my quest for more femininity.

Communication – Implying instead of Saying

I have observed that women talk a lot but it is not always meant for communication. They don’t talk to communicate. They talk to get things off their chest. The communication in their speech is not contained in the words but in the empty spaces in between. So when you hear me talk in future, I don’t want you to listen to the words and try to offer solutions; I want you to feel what I feel and let me now you will always be there for me no matter what.

Books

I like reading but I realised with utter shock that I have mostly been reading books written by men. I have now ventured to make sure that at least a third of all books I read are written by women. It is only a woman who can understand how to make me feel in touch with myself.

Movies

Being the typical African Macho Man, I have always favoured movies which go ‘bang bang’ with lots of blood. Now, I prefer movies that go ‘sniff sniff’ with lots of tears. I no longer want movies which put me on the edge of my seat with tension. Instead, I want those that make me discover my innermost feelings and release all the tension in my heart. The romantic stories that make me teary eyed towards the end are now my in-thing.

Feeling Ish Ish

Ish ish is a word that cannot be found in any dictionary but is widely used among women. Ish ish is that feeling you have that you cannot describe but any woman will understand how you feel. With a better enhanced right-hand brain hemisphere, I can feel ish ish without feeling guilty of feeling like I have to explain myself.

P.S. By the way, it would also be good for women to get in touch with their masculine side for the sake of equality.