When
I was in high school, we had the best head master ever. He spoke the impeccable
‘Queen’s English’ and we always looked forward to parade just to hear him talk.
On almost every occasion, he would use a new vocabulary which would prompt us
to rush and get our dictionaries out immediately after parade before the word
‘evaporated’. Inasmuch as he was big on words, he was not so keen on ego. He
was a confident man and we could tell he feared nobody.
One
time we wanted to strike for a reason I can now not recall. He convened an
assembly of those of us who were not too keen on the strike but were afraid of
being labelled traitors. We converged in the hall while others were outside
throwing stones. He appeared totally unmoved as he said something we have
continued quoting to this day. He said, “If you want to burn the school, burn
it. I will not stop you. It will be your parents’ loss when they pay for the
damages. Meanwhile, whatever you are asking for will not be granted. This is
the last time am addressing you. Next it will be the police so you have a
choice to continue with the strike or go back to class.”
After
that ultimatum, nobody was too keen to continue with the strike, so we went
back to class and that was the last attempt at a strike for my school mates and
me for the rest of our school life. Our head master had a very strong presence
and was full of charisma. He preferred that we refer to him by the title of
‘Sir’. He once said, “You should address me as ‘Sir’. However, whether you accept
to call me sir or not, I will still remain a ‘Sir’.”
Last
week, I followed the story about a discussion that took place in parliament. It
was to do with terms of address and protocol for the myriad seat holders that
our generous new constitution has bestowed upon us. The honourable members of
parliament were of the opinion that they are the only ones worthy of the
honourable title. They were angered by the “insignificant” Members of County
Assemblies using their (apparently) ‘God Ordained’ title of “Honourable
Members”. They were also equally (if not more) angered by Governors using the
title of ‘His Excellency’, which they claim is a preserve of only the
President, his Deputy, and former holders of the positions.
The
‘Honourable’ members went as far as prescribing just punishment for those who
flout this ‘infringement’ on their turf. A Governor who considers himself
‘Excellent’ now stands to be Ksh. 2 Million poorer, or be a ‘guest of the state’
for 12 months, thanks to the new proposed amendment to the ‘Order of Precedence’
Bill. According the ‘honourable’ members, only they can be called ‘honourable’
without getting into trouble.
I
took the trouble of consulting my dictionary in order to get the true meaning
of the word. I learnt that the word has two meanings. One is, “Worthy of being
honoured; entitled to honour and respect”, while the other one is, “Adhering to
Moral and Ethical principles”. I will leave it to you to see if our members of
parliament conform to the true meaning of the word. I also hope that my title
of a layman is not under any threat. If it was taken away, I don’t know what I
would become.
When
a new Government structure was formed under the new constitution, I got the
impression that the Senate was one parliament too many. I could not understand
what its real importance was. After the recent tirades by the national assembly
however, I think we would rather have the senate and do away with the national
assembly. They seem very idle and this recent discussion proves that they are
trying very hard to find something useful to do with their time without much
success.
In
other news and as the MPs were busy discussing titles, the courts declared CDF
unconstitutional, claiming it undermines devolution. As a layman I am
wondering, who between the MPs and Governors is going to have the last laugh.
P.S. As I was writing this article, I
kept typing ‘humourable’ instead of ‘honourable’. I wonder what the spirit was
trying to say.
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